Called To Love

     I recall from my childhood, that my favorite place to be was in my grandparent's arms.
Honestly, it still is. It's the best feeling in the world. To know that you are cared for, and loved deeply and to just be with that person who shows you that constant favor is like no other. It's called love… and everyone is called to love in their unique way. Love cannot be beaten, broken down, or defeated. It always always shows itself in the darkest places, and it's usually something very small that opens the eyes of many.

     Millions upon millions of people are out there who believe that they are not worth love, that they are not worth this beautiful life. Unknown to them though, it's not true. I believe that EVERYONE no matter how small, how wide, how tall, how big, is worthy. There are so many unique situations that have made people feel unwanted, and things of that sort. And at times, everyone feels like that. It's never all sunshine,smiles, and s'mores.

     That's why I have recently discovered that ,as of right now, I am being called to just love others. Instead of killing myself over wether God is calling me to the marriage or religious life, I've taken the hint that I should just focus on loving.To truly love them and sincerely love them. When I say "others", I mean everyone. It doesn't matter who you are and what you've done - I strive to look at others with love, compassion, and friendship. I want to let them know that I won't judge, it's not my place - or anyone else's. I just want to simply be and do everything Christ is calling me to do. Maybe, hopefully, through my actions people will then see that if a human being contains and shows this love then there has to be something more.. Maybe that is then the start for that person to find the source of the ultimate love. And if it had to be because Jesus called me to die to myself so that He may give me His eyes, His hands, His heart - then so be it. I can't see myself living for anything/anyone other than Jesus and others. But I could never desire it, never do it without the Source of love. Love reveals many,wondrous things - in general, and a better understanding of who you are as a person and what you are made for.

     Jesus calls everyone to treat others how you, yourself would want to be treated. He also calls us to love even the least of these. Including unborn babies. And something that has been taking a toll on my heart this past year is to love those mothers/fathers who have gotten an abortion, or a couple who is thinking about getting one. They just need to know that someone actually does care for them and their baby. That someone will actually be with them through the process instead of encouraging them to take the fastest, most destructive route by "getting rid of the problem". Because most of the time the mothers don't even know the outcomes that can come from having an abortion. But that's a blog for another day.. This post is getting pretty lengthy, and I still have unspoken things to put on here! Stay with me guys.

     When on the topic of judgement, I get pretty heated. I feel like judgement is something everyone grew up with and it taught us that if you judge someone then you're making yourself feel better, therefor heightening your self esteem. So why not treat yourself once in a while? Well that's the problem, we judge others so that we may benefit from it but we fail to see that the person you're judging may not want to be your little dose of self esteem. No doubt about it, everyone has gotten judged and has judged others, but that doesn't mean that you have to keep on judging others just because they may judge you. Plus, I like to see it as it's none of their business anyway - So they can think what they want, say what they want about me but only I know what my intentions are. And if my attentions are in the right place, I will love those who wrongly judge me and just hand them over to Jesus.

     No matter who you are and what you are called to do with your life, you are called to love.Like if I become a religious sister, I'm being called to love - If I become a wife and mother, I'm being called to love. Also, at the workplace, school, and in public I'm called to love. But it's not just me, EVERYONE (I don't know how many times I put this out there), but every single one of you are called to love and care for others, as with loving yourself also. 

I wrote this a while back and it seems appropriate to share:

"If love was merely just a word, then I might find myself using it as often as you do. But love is not just a word. Love was not created to be a word, but a sincere, true action of one's own heart. For love is eternal. Love can't cease to be, but only increase in ways bigger than who we are thought to be."

A Prayer For A Sinner's Heart
"Lord Jesus, grant that I may see in you the fulfillment of all my need, and may turn from every false satisfaction to feed on you, the true and living bread.
Enable me to lay aside the sin that clings so closely , and run with perseverance the race set before me, looking to you, the pioneer and perfecter of my faith."

 "As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Abide in my love.  If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and abide in his love. These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full. “This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command you. No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you. You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he may give it to you. These things I command you, so that you will love one another."
John 15:9-17


Excuse Me While I Fall For You

Every girl has this image in her mind of her prince charming. Her perfect man. Some may think of Channing Tatum just because he's hot, and some may think of a more moral guy who hasn't taken part in a stripper movie like Ryan Gosling(; Being beside the point… We have this fantasy of a man who is close to perfect, and as we grow up we stop believing that this fantasy guy exist. So what do we do? Find someone who fits temporarily. We stoop for people we never intended to make exceptions on. Especially if the guy is super cute and has a gorgeous smile. Sometimes you can't help yourself and actually want to stoop, even though you know this will not be good in the long run. YOLO. The truth is (in my perspective) if he isn't genuinely kind to others and is disrespectful then he is NOT worth any of your time and possibly other things that you never intended to be broken. Give him time to mature a bit. All I'm saying is, that if he doesn't have a good, moral character then what's to fall in love with? Appearances don't last forever. I have had personal experiences (and still do) where the person's attitudes and actions make them unattractive in every single way.  It's so important to fall in love with someone who respects everyone including you, their parents, and themselves. And the best way to attract a respectful guy is to be respectful. Be what you want in others.

     As for me, I'm looking for a guy who will put God above all things and love Him more than anything. And that is including him loving God above me. Someone said to me, "How could you ever want? I want my husband to be in love with me fully and give me the attention I need." I thought that that was funny and a bit ironic if I'm using that term correctly. I thought to myself, "Well if he loved God above you, he would have this deeper love for you and for all of God's creation. He would cherish you as a true gift and find joy within you." Now, honestly, that doesn't sound that bad to me. I just think it makes sense. It fits. It should be what every woman desires in man and every man desires in a woman . We should be loved and desired how God wants His daughter to be loved by a man. We shouldn't have to stoop to the next best thing and get hurt. It makes me sincerely sad to see all these girls getting hurt by these guys who made them think that they were only good enough for them for a certain amount of time. Because it's not true. God intended for relationships, for marriages, to be a symbol of His undying, eternal love for you. All I want to say is wait, be patient upon the Lord. He will give you someone who is perfect for you, and you only. Be patient. As the evil "mother" in Tangled said, "Good things come to those who wait."

I haven't lost hope yet and I have been waiting for 17 years and when I even think about stooping for this guy ,I keep on reminding myself that if I can do it for 17 years, I can wait two more years. The reason I say two more years is because I'll be out of New Roads and have a way better selection of guys to pick from, and holy men at that (in Ohio). Living in a small town all of her life doesn't do much justice for a girl who is looking for a guy who hasn't been with all of the girls at school. It also doesn't help because you start to lose hope that good, moral men even exist. You start to believe that they went extinct in the 70's. But I can't judge, they do have truly good guys in this small town. I just haven't really found them yet, or maybe I better say- I haven't searched for them. My mind is elsewhere than having a relationship with a boy and has been for some time. It's not what I focus on, rather I look towards what God wants me to do and try to become the woman He wants me to become first. Then, maybe, I'll give a second thought to a guy. I honestly don't think about the boyfriend part, I just skip to the engagement/marriage part and what my expectations are of my husband, not a boyfriend. Other key points I want him to have is a good pair of feet(dancing wise), and a good sense of humor(not perverted wise) and also be super adventurous.I'm always up for an adventure. It would be good to have someone who can either calm me down a bit or just be the same kind of crazy with me. I don't plan on calming down though.(;
     Anyways, just give it time. As I said before, everything will fall into place. You do not need a boyfriend to maintain happiness. A key note is to just have faith in Christ and enjoy the time and the people He gives you in the present.  I always find that extremely hard to do because I'm so wrapped up in other things that I don't realize what a blessing my life is and how I should cherish it every moment. It gets pretty difficult to tell yourself that when you have two insane brothers destroying your room frequently, but that's just the way my life is and I've come to accept it. No matter what, anytime I'm gone I always look forward to being in this crazy house of mine and having to hug "Teddy" a million times. So enjoy your family and friends while you have them and don't worry about the future. Seek the will of God.

Awesome advice from the book:
"How to Find Your Soulmate without Losing Your Soul"

--The higher the love, the more demands will be made on us (women) to conform to that idea. To a great extent the level of any civilization is the level of it's woman hood. When a man loves a woman, he has to become worthy of her. The higher her virtue, the more noble the character, the more devoted she is to truth, justice, and goodness, the more a man has to aspire to be worthy of her. The history of civilization can actually be written in terms of the level of it's women.

-Patience is important not only waiting for the right time to start a relationship, but also in allowing it to unfold at a healthy pace. Impatience rushes everything. It urges us to skip the time and attention a healthy friendship requires and to jump into emotional and physical intimacy.

- -Love your body. Love your future husband. Love God. - Do these things and your path will become clear in time.

-Love as experience should be subordinated to love as virtue, so much so that without love as virtue there can be no fullness in the experience of love.

--NEVER SETTLE FOR LESS THAN YOU DESERVE BECAUSE YOU'RE AFRAID THAT NOTHIN BETTER WILL COME ALONG. What you really should be afraid of is how much of your life is passing you by because you're too busy doing things that are beneath your dignity.

(last one, I promise) 
I love this saying
****If a woman raises her standards, will she find herself alone? Initially, she probably will. Although it may sound counterproductive, a woman must deliberately decrease her odds of finding a guy in order to increase her odds of finding a soulmate.****

That book is amazing. I advise everyone should go read it. 

Let there be no doubt that You honor those who honor You, and that You always give Your best to those who leave the choice with You.

"For charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
 but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised."
Proverbs 31:30

St. Elizabeth Ann Seton, pray for us.
^Also a fellow convert to the Catholic Church.^ <3


Merry New Year

     First, may I just say, happy feast day of our Mother Mary and happy New Year! I still can't believe 2012 is over with. So bittersweet. Although, I can't wait to see what the Lord has in store for me this year! One of my new year's resolutions is to pray the Rosary daily. It may sound simple, but to me it's extremely hard. I've tried multiple times but it always gets away from me. I'm trying to exercise my faith more, as well as my body. Still trying to motivate myself on the body part.
     As some of you know, January 1st is a Holy Day of Obligation and I started 2013 off great by sleeping in and missing Mass today *sarcasm is intended*. I missed all the local Masses and had this great idea that my parents would take me to Baton Rouge to go to Mass there (which was a failed attempt). So I was stuck at home with nothing left but my laptop and my TV to provide Mass for me. Thank God for technology because I found a website that has daily Mass and I got so excited. After the Gospel Reading, as usual, the Priest went on to say his homily. Well after 30 seconds of listening I finally comprehended that I couldn't understand one word this Priest was saying. Great... I continued on with my life and started doing my clothes and I got the urge to turn on the TV. I did so, and the channel happened to be on EWTN, and guess what was on?! - Mass. Also, the Priest just started his homily, and in english. So in the long run it all worked out.
     2012 was a heck of a year for me. It would be accurate to say that it was the most memorable year yet. I could sum up the events of 2012 and say that I got closer to God and grew more in my faith. There was definitely ups and downs in 2012, but I have to say that the hardships I went through TAUGHT me about my faith, which then drew me closer to Christ. I realized that in my hardships I desired the peace of Christ and that the only way to attain true happiness is through Him. Of course there was spiritual droughts, which exhausted me, but I knew that Christ wouldn't put this upon me if He knew I couldn't handle it and that it was for a reason. -- Just to draw me closer to Him-- Now looking back upon it I smile because then I realize that He has it under control and that I should just trust in Him and put my faith in Him only. He knows what He's doing. Just like the situation that happened to me today it may seem crazy and chaotic at the moment but it will all work out. You are under God's hands.


I pray that in this upcoming year You may be everything to those who allow you to simply be in their lives. I pray that most everyone will see You as faithful and loving as they look to the past, present, and future. +JMJ+

"The unfailing love of the LORD never ends! By his mercies we have been kept from complete destruction. Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each day. I say to myself, "The LORD is my inheritance; therefore, I will hope in him!"
 - Lamentations 3:22-24